Mind over Matter

The most talked about thing around me right now is...........


Jeng


Jeng


Jeng



M-O-N-E-Y!



Haha, everyone is broke seemingly and me too.
But surprisingly I just got a pair of gladiator like shoe yesterday and it caused me to be RM140 poorer.

How pathetic is that?

I always have this thing where you feel guilty after spending so much on things which you obviously really want but it costs you like fortune.

And I am feeling that 'feeling' again right at this moment.
And it is not about that shoes i just bought mind you.
I really need a pair of sandlescos' I haven't had them since last Nov. (Again, how pathetic is that?)

I am talking about something I am planning to buy soon but kind of still contemplating and deciding.
I am not from such a rich family like what a lot of people (you know who you are people) think.
I am just an ordinary kampung boy FYI and that's it.

The thing about the feeling I am having right now is that it always bothers me all this while and it is not just now that I have it.
All this while, I always have this feeling of guilt after spending on anything, even food (mind you,it's not just an ordinary food but those of the costly ones which I obviously can replace with something else,something cheaper and still fulfilling?
Call me scrooge or "stingy like a fish" person but yup, that's me.
But the thing is that, I am still spending like nobody's business.

I eat these "costly food" all the time without even thinking about its price, sometimes.

I buy clothes and shoes like a true fetishist.

And after that, I feel guilty and bad about it after that.

Do you know how bad I feel after spending my money?

I will start thinking of how poor people have to work hard everyday to earn money to feed their family and kids?

How bad people in Africa and any filthy poor country in the world are in serious need of food, starving to death not having enough healthy food for them and their family and children?

How I can spend the money I just spent on something else more beneficial like buying books for my nieces and nephews, presents for my family and stuffs like that which are more meaningful and thoughtful?

Or maybe how I can just keep the money?

It saddens me remembering that some people are not as lucky as I am.
It really strikes me now that I have to really think wisely before using my money.
It's like the one in the movie "Confession of the Shopaholics" where you ask yourself "do I need this?" whenever you are buying anything.

I know sometimes I too need to indulge myself in something that I really want to, like eating at fancy restaurants, buying some.....or rather a few piece of designer clothes, branded shoes and so on.
But that does not mean that i get to go over board right?

Yeah, now I really have come to my senses.

There are so much more than just all those worldly things.

I have been thinking about this, about how pathetically ungrateful monster of big spender I am.

It's all about making the right and wise decision about how and where to spend your money.

It's like how people always say it,

"It's mind over matter"

Be wise and smart!!!